Ep. 198 - Sam Hawley - From Stage 4 Brain Cancer to Purpose: Same Hawley on MT

[00:00:09] Welcome to Mental Toughness Podcast with Dr. Rob Bell. Each week, Dr. Rob sits down with athletes, executives, and expert coaches to talk about mental toughness and their hinge moment. Here's your host, Dr. Rob.

[00:00:34] They were just like, please do not do anything today. Like, you need to just rest. You need to stay in bed. You can stay on the couch. And I'm not doing that. I don't care. That's when that SEAL moment kicked in. I'm like, I started thinking about those guys and how they operate. I was like, this is my war zone. They were like, please. And I'm like putting my shoes on and like, I can barely stand that stable. And I was just like, I'm doing it. And they're like, well, let your dad let fall into your car. I'm like, no, like these moments are for me, me and God.

[00:01:01] These are my pray for moments where I will go out there, just pray and run and focus on that. On the Mental Toughness Podcast, today's guest is a brain cancer survivor, founder of Warrior's Path organization, dedicated to supporting brain tumor research. After being diagnosed with stage four brain cancer at the age of 29, he underwent surgery at Duke University, followed by chemotherapy, radiation. During treatment, he committed to running every day.

[00:01:31] His journey has been featured on the documentary, The Power of Purpose, which chronicles not only his battle with cancer, but his transformation involving his faith. He's the owner of Zero Gravity Media, founder of Elevated Fitness and Nutrition, and continues to use his story to encourage others to live with purpose, embrace adversity, and find the warrior within. Our guest today, Sam Hawley. Sam, my man, thanks for joining us, bud. Thanks for having me, man.

[00:02:00] Well, I want to start, like, you growing up, man, because your mom described you as a wild man. We've spoken before. I mean, you surfed. You were bikes, man. What were you like as a kid? She's got the wording right. Yeah, it was definitely a wild man. Always running around with my friends. We were all into pretty much anything that was just extreme sport related, and we loved adrenaline. And I guess that's the younger age is kind of what showed me about adrenaline junkies and still chasing that. But yeah, just running around, riding bikes.

[00:02:29] I mean, the list kind of goes on. Surfing, snowboarding, skiing. Anything that boosts that adrenaline, we were all seeking that and chasing it. So, yeah. Because our stories are similar when it comes to that stuff, right? I mean, we're dopamine junkies to a point, right? Like, you got to work for that dopamine. And we'll kind of get into that story that you have as well. And, you know, because there's always kind of been, hey, man, there's an ulterior side to that as well. I don't want to do, like, lay out your story, man.

[00:02:58] So, I'm hoping, like, you could just pick it up, man. Like, 2023, when you get the diagnosis and that's a hinge moment that changes everything. And just pick us up from there, man. Yeah. I mean, it's the best way to look at it. It was the year that changed my life for the better, to be completely honest. Just, yeah, it's been about three years. This September will be three years on the dot since I've gotten sober and since I had the surgery and everything. And since the journey began.

[00:03:24] Yeah, I mean, starting kind of from the get-go of it, I just kind of started feeling pretty weird for a couple weeks. And I kept getting these chills. And then those chills would turn into heat, just sweating. And it was about one to two minutes. And I didn't really realize at the time, but those were, like, mini seizures. And for two weeks, I was having those. And one day, I had, was, you know, kind of already made a decision. I'm like, all right, something's going on. And maybe it has to do with my diet. Maybe it has to do with how much I've been drinking.

[00:03:53] So let's change that. And that day, I went and got, like, a salmon. I'll never forget. I went and got a salmon from this really great place where you can get healthy food. And got a salmon, some veggies, went back to the house. It was just me and my dog. And threw the salmon on, grilled it, ate it. And then I remember I hadn't felt anything that day. So I was like, all right, this is good. You know, I'm feeling good. Today's been a great day. And literally, like, 20 minutes after I ate, I started that feeling, started to kind of creep back in. And this time, it was a little bit more advanced, I could tell.

[00:04:23] And I immediately just knew something was wrong. So I called my parents. And I don't think I'd even told them anything about the previous two weeks of those feelings and whatnot. I called my parents and was just, like, on the phone with them. I'm like, something's not right. Like, I haven't really talked about this. But I've been feeling really weird for a couple weeks. And right now, I'm extremely feeling it. And they're questioning it. And as they're talking, I started to kind of fade out of reality. And all of a sudden, words weren't coming out of my mouth. And I just remember everything went black.

[00:04:51] And yeah, apparently, I had a major seizure. And I dropped. And when I dropped, I hit my face on the table, split my chin open. And I woke up to my buddy and his wife just, like, beating on my door. Because my parents immediately called them because they live five minutes from me. And I remember getting up and, like, opened the door. And everything was just, like, very fuzzy. Kind of like a major concussion is what it kind of felt like looking back. And they were assessing me. And they're like, your shin's bleeding. Like, what just happened? And I was like, nothing. Like, nothing happened. Like, I had no idea what had just happened.

[00:05:21] EMS pulled up. And they got me on the bus. And they were pretty much just like, yeah, you just had, like, a major seizure. Like, you need to go to the ER. And I was like, well, I'm not riding on this. So they took me to the ER. And we sat there for hours. My parents came in. Drove from High Point to Wilmington. It was about a three-hour drive. And they got there in about two hours and 30 minutes. And they took me back to do the MRI. And yeah, I mean, I was kind of sedated. I do remember that. And then I remember coming out of the MRI.

[00:05:51] And they put me in the hospital. It was like full. I remember I was on a bed in the hallway with other people. It was that packed. And I just remember my parents coming in. And at the same time that my parents came in, the doctor came in to tell us what was going on, which was a meaningful moment for them to be there at that time. They were just like, we did the MRI. We found something on your brain. And it looks like it's a tumor. They didn't state what kind of tumor they thought it was. But I remember as soon as he said that, I literally passed out. And that's it. I don't remember anything else the rest of the night.

[00:06:20] I woke up the next morning at the hospital. We had to stay the night. And the doctor that was in there told us that they had found a tumor. And they said it was about the size of a golf ball. They had an idea of what it was. But they didn't confirm that until everything needed to be done. But yeah, they were pretty much just like, we can do it. It's a great time to remove it. We can get it done now. And we kind of had that faithful moment of my mom was just like, let me make some calls. And my mom made some calls. And those calls ended up being with Duke. A friend of hers referred her to call a certain person there.

[00:06:48] And he's the legend of that place, Dr. Freeman. Absolute legend. He's like 78 now, I think. And he's still full-time. He's a beast. Full-on legend. But yeah, got a hold of him. And he was just pretty much like, come tomorrow. And let's go over everything. And so we did that. Got the MRI. Did all that. He confirmed it. He already kind of knew what it was as well. He's like, not tomorrow, but the next day. Come on, let's go ahead and do the surgery. So yeah.

[00:07:14] So I mean, it was probably the gnarliest 48 hours just anticipating what that was going to be like. And I had a bunch of friends and families come together. And there was a huge prayer group. I think like over 300 people were at this big church in my hometown the night before surgery, which was super meaningful to me. And two days later, it was a hard two days to get to that point. But I was just ready to go in and do it. And yeah, we went to Duke and got in there. And I checked in and I'll never forget any of that, like just having to walk in with like

[00:07:44] luggage into a hospital and having my family and friends with me. And they pretty much just were like, yep, tomorrow morning, we're going to get you going and whatnot. So I had to get these, I don't even know, I can show you a picture, but these little like dots all attached to my head. And I remember doing that and just kind of that fear started to really set in. And then I had a big group of friends come to see me, which helped. They stayed till like 1130 that night. We just sat out in this little area where they let me chill and talk to them and which really helped was very needed.

[00:08:14] But yeah, we had surgery the next day. That day is so special to me because that day changed my life forever for the better. And I had a moment where that day I felt the most fear I've ever felt that I'll ever feel. And the moment where they took me back and that fear was getting more extreme, the more that I got away from my family that I was with. And then I was with these two guys that were rolling me down the hallway.

[00:08:41] And I felt a moment where I felt these two hands on my shoulders. And that moment, I have cold chills even talking about it. That moment, I felt the most peace I'd ever felt in my entire life. And I know that was God right there. Going from extreme fear to extreme peace was a feeling that I can't even describe. I really can't describe it besides it was very special and it was very needed for me. And I remember getting to that door and it was like going on like a spaceship. They hit these buttons and just a big metal door slid.

[00:09:10] And we go in and I can see my picture. I was supposed to be more sedated. And they even, they thought that I was, but I remember all this. I see like a huge screen with my head on the wall. I could see the tumor. I saw a lady in there sharpening knives. And like there was these big drill bits and stuff. So like I'll never forget that. And I wasn't supposed to see that, but then I had to get in a straight jacket and they drilled my head to this metal table. And it was kind of like, that was like a movie scene. It felt like, like Saul is what it reminds me of.

[00:09:40] But yeah, they finally did all the work, got me seduced where I had the procedure and it was supposed to be like five to six hour procedure. I do remember I did have to, they woke me up midway through. Once they get in, they have to make sure that you can speak and you can read and see. So I remember this hand coming underneath and I was seeing these like pictures, like a pig and a horse and all this kind of stuff. And you had to name them. And wow. Because you're under the knife at that point, right? Yeah. Yeah. He's actually in there doing it. They wake you up and you have to identify a pig and a horse and.

[00:10:10] Yep. I had to name everything. And I got a hundred on that, which was great. But I remember hearing he has this little tube where he's sucking it out. And it sounded like when you're in a dentist's office, when they have that in your mouth and they're drying it, same sound. So something I'll never forget either, but it was a blessing. It was only like they did it way quicker. It was just a moment where I truly feel that big prayer that was said for me the night before changed everything. They got in there and they got it out within three and a half hours.

[00:10:36] And when he got in there, I remember Dr. Friedman telling me this, looking at the screen, it was the size of a golf ball. When he got in and operated, it was the size of a marble. He's never seen anything like that, that the screen is always accurate. And then when he actually got in there, it was smaller. And that prayer, I know changed that moment for that, which means a ton. And yeah, the procedure was done. Everything, you know, stapled up. He went out and told my family, like everything went great. Got it done quicker than most of those surgeries get done.

[00:11:05] And he told them about the size was not what was actually seen. So, which was a huge blessing and just said great things and he'll be great. He's very straightforward person. Yeah. The next morning I slept all through the night and there's pictures. Of some friends, they got to come in and see me and my head's wrapped up. And like, I'm barely awake, which I don't remember any of that. But the next morning when I did get up, I had a bunch of people there that, you know, not everybody could come into the room, but a lot of people there. And the first thing I did when I woke up, I just sat up in bed and everybody that was

[00:11:34] in there, the nurses and stuff, they're like, what are you doing? I'm like, I want to get up. Like, I feel great. I want to get up. And they're like, you're not supposed to. I'm like, well, I'm going to, I'm going to get up. And I slung my feet around and stood up with no problems. And they're all like, kind of holding me. I'm like, I'm good. Like, I want to go for a walk. Like, I want to walk. And my parents had come in and another person, his name is Sintel. He's pretty much like the sidekick, Dr. Friedman. He's a full legend. He's become such a great friend of mine. He walked in with me and he was like, all right, if he wants to walk, if he can get up and do that, like, let's walk.

[00:12:04] So we walked the ICU floor and I'll never forget that. I was the only one that was awake. And I'll never forget seeing how many people had just gone through that brain surgery as we walked. And there's pictures of me and Sintel just kind of walking together, a big smile on my face. He's holding a catheter. And so like, I just got out of surgery. My head's still wet, bandage on. And they, you know, we got back in the room. They're like, the fact that you can do that, we'll check you out today. We'll check you out today. So I'm like, good. I need to get out of here.

[00:12:31] And so, yeah, we got out a couple hours later. We had to stay in Durham for a few days and we stayed in a Airbnb pretty close to the hospital. It was on a cul-de-sac and we got there. And I just remember telling myself like, I'm going to win no matter what. Like I just had this thought come in of like victory. It was the mindset. And I was like, today I'm going to start. Like today's the healing day. So yeah, I got back there and they told me to not do anything for like weeks.

[00:12:57] But like, that's kind of where that like young me came in where like, I'm not listening to anybody. Yeah, we were listening to doctors then. I get it. Yeah. Yeah. We got there and there's a picture of me, but like, I'm, I started walking that cul-de-sac just slow. I could barely walk, but I'm like, I'm just going to do it. So a couple laps and then, you know, went inside and went to sleep. And Sam, when you're walking that cul-de-sac there, is that when that transformation even started? Like, did you start to have that image of what you wanted to do and the impact? I think that was right at the beginning of it.

[00:13:27] That was right when that like spark happened in it. And it was just like, I'm not going to let anything stop me and I'm not going to, I'm not going to let anything get in the way. I'd say that really is the moment that everything started to shift. And, um, you know, my faith just started to really get stronger and stronger and stronger. And so, yeah, I did that literally, you know, every day we had to stay for three days and I would just do it a couple of times, like breakfast, wake up, eat, go out there and walk for a little bit, come back in. And same, I just did it throughout the day. And then they released this to go back home.

[00:13:56] And I was currently living in Wilmington, but I went back to High Point, my parents' house for like a week and got back there and was pretty much just like, I'm going to get after it. Like, I'm going to start my training. Like, I'm not going to stop doing anything. And so I started to just kind of do, do the walks. Cause they're like, don't run, like, don't lift weights. You can't do any of that stuff. I'm like, all right, well, you know, they suggested not walking, but I'm like, I'm going to walk. Like I can do that. My feet, my legs, they work. So I'm good.

[00:14:23] So I started just kind of walking and weeks kind of went by to where it was time to start chemo and radiation. I guess a few days before that was the day that I was like, I'm going to run. Like I'm going to run. I know I'm not supposed to, but I'm, you know, I don't care. At the point, I didn't have any fear at that point. It was just like, I had consumed that. And I'm like, nothing's going to stop me. So I know I was told to not do this, but I feel like I can. So I'm going to try it. So a light jog, like one morning, just a light jog about 50 yards and then another 50 yards.

[00:14:53] The next morning, a hundred yards. And then we went up to the mountains a couple of days before. And this is when I had just the most. Can I set that one up, Sam? Yeah. Just because when we spoke, man, like, I mean, I felt this was such an impactful part because like faith isn't really faith until it's all you got. But you describe you're in that cold river and there's a light from a photograph, man. And feeling like God was showing something, showing you something. You even went for a run afterwards.

[00:15:22] But I appreciate you just letting me set that up, man. But yeah, that part was, was one of these impactful moments, man. And take us from there. Yeah. I mean, to be completely honest, that trip, it's the most amazing trip I've ever had in my life. We, yeah, we went up to do North Carolina, which is a beautiful place. And we had an Airbnb right on the river and it was my family and my dog. And we just had a beautiful setting. And I was still kind of doing my just very light, you know, 100 yard run, stop, walk,

[00:15:53] just that and the other. And I had this moment where I really was just like, I want to, I want to get like the ice bath going. I've been learning about Wim Hof and all that. And I was just like, I want to do like the legit like river ice bath. And my cousin, Cole, he was like, let's do it. So he lives up there. And we got out in the Watauga River. We, it was a special moment. My dog even came out there. It was really cold for a little dog, but he was right there with us. And we just went in and sat there and my sister was standing on the, like in the front yard of where we're at.

[00:16:21] And she took this very special picture that she didn't even know was there. None of us really noticed it was there until we saw it. But me and Cole sat in the water for probably about 15 minutes and she took a few pictures. And when she, we got out and she was just like, you have to see this. And she showed us. And there's this big, beautiful light from God shining directly on my head. And there's another light that's shining on my cousin.

[00:16:45] And that light was a moment where I felt a feeling that I can't even describe as well. Kind of like the moment when we're going into surgery. I knew that moment was special. And I knew that that was a meaningful moment for me to realize that God's right here with me. And there's, I kind of started to realize after seeing that this, something about this is, is going to be special. Something about this is unique. The next day, same thing. We got in and we stayed out there a little bit longer. I think 20 minutes and the water was frigid, but it just, it just felt relieving.

[00:17:15] And then the picture that next day is just a big bright light on me again. We all kind of had tears right then when we got out because Olivia just came out and was just sitting there watching, watching us. And she just took another picture and she didn't see anything. We didn't either. Like it was a beautiful day. And when we came in and saw that, that's when it just like truly hit me. Like God is with me. He's blessing me. There's a purpose behind this. I'm finding my purpose, finding my journey. And at that moment I was like, I'm going to go put my running shoes on. Like I'm ready.

[00:17:42] That like inspiration and that desire and that determination clicked that day. And I literally put my shoes on and went and ran for the first time a mile without stopping. It felt amazing. And I walked back and then that evening I went back out and did another mile. And then the next day I did two miles and I felt great. Like it was mentally helping me a lot. And I'd never really, I'd run previously. I'd been, I'd done like a half before all this stuff, but I'd never felt that version

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[00:19:36] Go to L-Y-T-E balance.com. Tell me about those first couple of runs, man. I mean, you experience it. You know, it's a God experience, and now you're finding your true purpose. Go just a little bit deeper into that, man. Yeah, I mean, the runs were special. They were special because on the whole run, like while I'm running, you know, I'm going at a slow pace, but I'm just praying. I'm thanking God. I was crying because it was just me and God, and so I could release those tears that I needed to release.

[00:20:05] I could release that fear into his hands, and those runs helped demolish that fear. It helped me become stronger. Those first few that were just a run for me to cry and pray. And that's all I did. And that's because I could get away from everybody and everything was the first time I was just by myself after everything. So I needed those moments. So it was a way for me to get away from everything and just focus on that run and my ability and thanking God that I'm able to do so. Because not many people can do that after the surgery that I had.

[00:20:33] And especially within a couple weeks of that surgery, I just was like, faith is right here guiding me and blessing me to be able to do this. There's a purpose behind this. Those few runs just gave me that peace that I needed and gave me that freedom that I needed to be away from everybody, to be away from the questions and the conversations that were consistent. And it was freedom in those moments for me. And so that's why running became so special. And that's when I made a huge commitment to that.

[00:21:01] And I told myself, because I had to start chemo and radiation after that trip like three days later. And I told myself that I'm not going to let that stop me. I'm not going to let it slow me down. I committed. I said, this is my first biggest commitment. I'm not going to miss a single day. I'm going to run every day. I had to do six weeks chemo and radiation. I was like, I'm going to do it every day. And then my parents are going to tell me not to, but I don't care. That's when like, I call it the Navy SEAL mindset really kicked in.

[00:21:28] And that's when my faith became elite. I love that, Sam. You also talked about, man, like the hardest days is when you ran further. And then one in particular, your parents didn't want you to go, man, just rest, just take today off. It was one of those days that you even felt horrible and you still went on the run. And then something magical happened while you're out there. Yeah. That day as well. During this time, I had certain days that were just, I'll never forget.

[00:21:59] And that day was, yeah, it was the hardest day that I had chemo and radiation where I felt horrible. I remember sitting in the den, like on the couch. My parents were over there. This was back in Wilmington at my house and just me and my dog and my parents. And I just remember sitting there and just, they could just see in me, like I was starting to lose my hair. And I'd been doing chemo for, at that point, a couple of weeks in radiation. And I just, my parents were like, like today, and I'd been doing my running and I'd been doing my running and every day I didn't miss a single day.

[00:22:27] And this day was just when I'd been in it for a couple of weeks and it was hard. And they were just like, please do not do anything today. Like you need to just rest. You need to stay in bed or you can stay on the couch. And I'm not doing that. I don't care. That's when that, like that seal moment kicked in. And I'm like, I started thinking about those guys and how they operate. I was like, this is my war zone. They were like, please. And I'm like putting my shoes on and like, I can barely stand that stable. And, um, and I was just like, I'm, I'm doing it. And they're like, well, let your dad, they fall in your car.

[00:22:57] I'm like, no, like this, these moments are for me, me and God, these are my pray for moments where I will go out there, just pray and run and focus on that. Yeah. So I went out and I started running and the first mile was like brutal. And, but I was like, if I throw up or pass out fall, I don't, I was like, I don't care. Like I do not care. And I, uh, started going and, and once I got like out of my neighborhood and I'm on this like main road and I was just crying.

[00:23:22] I'll never forget all of a sudden just over my shoulder, my literally came right over my shoulder. These two beautiful Eagles just flew and they're never, ever really seen in Wilmington just flew right over me. And I just like immediately it was just starstruck and they're both following each other. And going around the trees and these obstacles. And I was just kind of looking at it. It's like, that's life. You have obstacles and look at these Eagles. Like they're finding their way around a really treed area and just those beautiful Eagle calls that they're doing.

[00:23:51] And I just dropped like just full tears. One of the most incredible moments I have ever experienced and ever seen. And they just kept flying around me. And that moment, like really it was another signal and sign that God is right here with me. And that moment when they kept flying, I was just running. I was like, I'm going to just keep going. I'm going to keep running. And I kind of ran in the direction where the Eagles were flying off to. And I just kept going. And that's when everything clicked in. And all of a sudden I started feeling great.

[00:24:20] And I ended up doing five miles that day. I got back to the house and was just like, I felt great mentally, physically, like demolished how chemo and radiation was making me feel. Demolished it and looked at it like that. Fully demolished it. Beat that situation. And my parents were just like, how did you just do that? And I was just like, because God. And I told them about the experience that I just had. And we all kind of just like broken into tears. And that moment is something that I'll never forget. And that's why I got this Eagle tattoo. It was from that moment.

[00:24:50] Sam, with that, I mean, there was even scripture then that you kind of went to after that, right? Yeah. Isaiah 40, 31. Mounted upon wings of eagles. Walk and not grow weary. Walk and not faint. You threw this process here. And I don't mean to skip around and tell me if I'm wrong on this. But I mean, God is in control now. And you talked about like putting everything in God's hands, even right after the diagnosis. And then these become, I always say nods from God, right? Because it rhymes.

[00:25:17] And if you want something to be well, like it's got a rhyme. So I always call it nod from God. You always want to nod from God rather than a nudge from the judge. But not to make light of this situation, man. I mean, you're starting to feel God's presence. He's transforming you at this time into who you're supposed to be and your purpose. Yeah. Big time. Big time. Moments like that just started really happening like daily almost. That's when that connection with God became something that I never knew that it could become.

[00:25:45] I mean, it is everything to me. My connection with God is stronger than that day now. And the story really goes on because, I mean, the situation that we kind of talked about when I was out on the beach. On the beach, weighted vest. You're rucking it, man. Yeah. Yeah. And it was a day where I just wanted to, I had this ruck vest from a good friend of mine who owns a company called Directional Force. He was sending me this gear because he just knew that I was just like ready to get after it. You know, I wanted to act like a seal. And so he sent me a ruck vest and I was starting to use it every day.

[00:26:12] And one day I was just like, I want to go out on the beach, barefoot, ruck vest. It was like a cloudy day and it was just flat, no wind. I just was kind of walking my feet in the water. And the craziest moment happened where it just, I don't know what it was. I fished, but I don't know what this fish was. I had no idea. But it was a little overfoot and it just kind of washed right up in front of me. It was flapping around, like going kind of crazy. And it was just, you know, I didn't think anything of it at that moment. But I like went, picked it up.

[00:26:39] And as I'm taking it back out to release it, like it was kind of just sitting in my hands. And as I released it, this big moment of ocean movement, like it wasn't a wave. It wasn't a wake or anything like that. It's just a, it's hard to describe, like a motion of ocean just hit from my ankles and just splashed up all over me completely. As I returned this fish to the water, as it went out of my hands, I got this just big rush of water, hit my ankles, splashed all over me. And I was just like, that's God.

[00:27:07] Like that's God blessing me, showering me with faith right there in that moment. I returned this fish to the ocean where it belongs. And God is blessing me and cleaning me and clearing me right now. And one of those moments too, where I just like immediately just like, thank you God for these signs. Like, thank you God for these things that you're putting in front of me to see, to know that you're right here with me. Special moment. You're going through these experiences and God's transforming you, getting ready to show you your purpose.

[00:27:37] But I mean, there were substances that were in your life as well, right? I mean, drinking, smoking, I mean, that left you as well. Yeah. Cause yeah. I mean, I was partying hard for years, like from high school all through college. And then to that, like right before surgery. I mean, I was quick. And was there pain that was leading to that? Or was that just partying to have a good time? There was addiction that I was trying to figure out how to let go, but I couldn't figure that out before all that.

[00:28:05] And I wanted to, I really did. Cause I could start to tell like mentally it was messing with me and physically it was messing with me. And I just was so consumed by it. And that was something that I kind of looked at. It's like, oh, that's like the cool things to do. Like, you know, when you're young, when you're young, when I was in high school, it's like what you do to be cool or whatever. And we all thought that we all thought that, you know, it's just like a common thing back in that, that generation, I would say. And it just stuck with me, you know, like the, it just started to just stick with me.

[00:28:35] And then it became a problem. Like it really did. I started to notice that like, there wasn't a day where I wasn't drinking and I was consistently smoking weed every day. Yeah. I mean, right. Like a couple of days before the seizure, that's when I was like, I'm not going to drink for a little bit. I'm not going to smoke for a little bit, but I had problems smoking too. I didn't drink for a couple of days, but like the day before I was going to do, I smoked last time ever. And the day, a couple of days prior to the seizure, like I said, it was the last beer that I'll ever have last time I'll ever smoke. So I've been sober ever since. And I love it.

[00:29:05] No one could pay me millions of dollars to ever have a drink or smoke any weed. It's just, it's not for me. It's behind me. It's something I was been trying to release. And then I had a reason and a way to do that. You're running at this point and a Spartan race then enters the conversation. And you start now, now you start training for that. And the second one that you raced in, you won. And then people started to see, Hey, the purpose about what was going on. Talk to us about that experience, man. Yeah.

[00:29:34] So yeah, the running continued. The running was like a big thing. And then I had this vision. I've been competing and surfing for so long and I miss competing. Like I was like, I want to do something. I want to challenge myself. And that's when I like, I think I'd heard of like the mud runs. I think I'd heard of some stuff. And then I came across like Spartan races and I was like, this is like, this is sweet. It's kind of right up my alley. Yeah. So I signed up and did one in Atlanta, flew down, stayed with my buddy. And it was awesome that he like drove me to go do this. And it was epic.

[00:30:04] Like I got second in that one. And in my division, it was like 102 or three people. So it was a pretty large division. And then getting second and I was doing chemo and radiation at the time. And it was a weekend. So I only did radiation Monday through Friday and I did chemo every day. So I didn't have to do radiation that weekend. So that's why I went and did it. And I had to take my chemo with me. But yeah, I did it and just like showed myself what I'm capable of doing. And I knew that I was the only one there that was on chemo and radiation.

[00:30:33] And that kind of lit a spark too. Like maybe I can show people that like what they can do when they go through situations like this. And then I was like, yeah, I want to sign up and do another one. And then I signed up and did one in Charlotte. It was a few weeks later. That one was another special day for me. It was just me and my dad that went. And I just had that like triggered mindset of like just that Navy SEAL. And went out and competed at probably the highest level I've ever competed.

[00:31:01] I knew it was 125 people in my division that day. We started, I'm kind of like battling with the first and second guy. And I'm in third. We're kind of getting, you know, kind of sharing lanes of getting back to first place, second, third. But we kind of take off. And I'm battling against these two other guys. And I was like smaller than these guys. This section came where we had this big like bucket, paint bucket, which was full of concrete that was heaviest. And that's when like that mindset, everything just drew in.

[00:31:27] And then that's where I got in front of them, these two bigger guys that could hold heavier weight than me. I don't know what it was, but I just launched it up on my shoulder and just kind of booked it as they were kind of doing like a fast-paced walk. I was just like, like I'm going. If I collapse, I collapse. And that's where I kind of got in front. And then just kind of took off after I dropped that all through the other sections, had no problems. I ended up winning it in first place. And my dad had mentioned, like when you go up to the podium and do all that, he mentioned the guy that was calling everything out.

[00:31:56] He was like, my son just did that on chemo and radiation. And I remember the guy like just didn't even have anything to say. And he came up and he was like, do you care if I like mention that? I was like. And he mentioned it as I'm like on the podium and getting my award. And just a huge amount of people were just a big round of applause. And that meant so much to me. And they asked, you know, where I was from, this kind of stuff. And that moment that day and everybody cheering, like gave me a lot more motivation and determination.

[00:32:22] And it showed me like this will go into hands of people that really need it. Like that win will really expand in people's hands that are either trying to get into this type of stuff or that are going through the hardest times of their life that I put God first. And I did. I was praying throughout that to just thanking God that I'm able to do this. I'm able to get through these obstacles and then finishing first place. It was a huge, faithful day for me as well. Hey, golfers. You might not even know that you're looking for it, but this is the best golf sock that you can have.

[00:32:52] The golf sock. Their grip technology is absolutely stunning. I even use it when I'm running. That's how good these socks are. You're absolutely going to love it. It's like a golf glove for your feet. The golf sock. Click on the link. I want to ask you about the warrior's path run. But the first question then is because I kind of consider this a near-death experience, right? I mean, it's not something where it was in a car accident or falling off a cliff.

[00:33:21] However, having gone through that, I was wondering if you could just talk to us about how gratitude and perspective changed after coming from this, right? Because now, hey, you're running. You're introducing hard things. Faith is now a component here. And you've overcome it. But talk to us, man, about faith. Well, perspective and gratitude, man. How that changed having gone through this. Well, it changed my perspective with everything. Like every day is a blessing.

[00:33:48] And that's what gratitude comes in every day is like I'm grateful for every day to put two feet on the floor. And that's what I thank God every morning. I say thank you for allowing me to take the breath of life and to put two feet on the floor. And I kiss this cross every morning. I bring it with me everywhere I go. And a different perspective on like how I look at everything. Like I looked at everything not the correct way, in my opinion, before everything happened. And now I'm still just building my new perspective of what God has blessed me with and what this life means to me and my faith.

[00:34:17] That provides just gratitude for me. You know, every day is a blessing to be able to feel great, to be able to go run, to be able to go surf, to be able to go paddleboard, to do the things that I love. It's just pure gratitude. I never looked at it like that before. Like my capabilities being an athlete, all that stuff. But now I look at it so differently that like I'm so grateful that I'm able to do what I do and I'm able to do it at an elite level. And I'm able to inspire people all through what I've gone through.

[00:34:45] And so many people that have come across my story, my journey has touched their lives. And so that just brings so much more gratitude into my life and sharing my faith with others that people did not have faith. And from my story, they found faith and they've never been more faithful and happy and joyful. And so that's where just pure gratitude comes in because that's my purpose. You know, I found my purpose through all this. And just being a faithful, godly son of God is just that's what's most important to me. And it always will be because God saved me.

[00:35:14] It just showed me how special life is. And in many ways, in many ways, like every day is very special to me. Just the fact that I'm healthy and I'm well, God saved me. And it's just it's every day special. Your 30th birthday, man, you created the Warriors Path Run. I mean, more than 300 people showed up. You raised over 62,000 for brain tumor research, man. And your purpose was there. But to talk to us about that experience.

[00:35:40] Yeah, I had a special moment where I had a call from Duke and they had great things to tell me. It was another part of faith where I had stage four glioblastoma and I already knew all that. But they told me and they said, we have actually something great to tell you that it's actually stage three. And they're like, we haven't really seen it do that for somebody. But like, and that's where faith was. In that moment, I was sitting in a parking lot with my parents getting gas. And I got out of the car for that call because anytime I get a call from it always would freak me out.

[00:36:10] And they were joyful in that call. And I remember as soon as we got off the phone, I said, I want to do something special for Duke. And I want to start, like my running was so firm then. I'm like, I want to start, like I want to do something. I want to create an event, like a running event, like a 5K, something like that. And I was like, I want to call it the warrior's path. That name came from a letter that I got from a retired Navy SEAL development group guy that wrote this amazing letter to me that means so much. His name's Cole Fackler. And the letters just talked about being a warrior.

[00:36:38] And so that's why that mindset of the warrior the whole time came into the reality of this is what I want to call it, the warrior's path. And yeah, so we started that. And for my 30th birthday, we did that for the first time. We had, yeah, like 300 people and we raised around 70 grand, which is awesome. And we gave it to Duke. And they were beyond grateful for that, you know, went into research and all that kind of stuff. But they just, to see, you know, they saw my story and they saw that I wanted to do something with it. So Duke, it meant a lot to Duke.

[00:37:05] And that kind of opened up a lot of doors for stuff that I do at Duke now. You know, somebody might be listening to this and they've gone through something similar, but a tragedy that hits. And the tragedy is immediate hinge moment because everything's different. But maybe their outcome was different than yours. And they're listening. Well, why is Sam different? Why was that example when somebody close to me died? And I know these are questions that we can't answer. What's the word of encouragement, man, that you need to give somebody who's going through a difficult time?

[00:37:35] Maybe they're struggling. Maybe they don't have that purpose. But what can you share with them? Put faith first. Build your relationship with God. I mean, when you do that, it changes everything for the better. And the amount of people that I've helped do that that did not have faith, did not believe in faith, had gone through so many different things that maybe it wasn't happening to them, but it was around them that just demolished their vision of faith and what they believed in. And then my story and my journey showed them that what faith is and what faith does.

[00:38:03] And when you have such a strong connection with God, how your life changes for the better. The way you think, the way you operate, the way you do everything. You find yourself. You find who you are. You do find your purpose. You find what you're meant to be and meant to do. And anytime conversations like this are brought up or anytime anyone asks, which is often, how did you do this? I just, I'm in faith. It's God. I put God first. And that's it. I mean, that's the most important aspect of why I am here today and who I am today

[00:38:32] and what got me through everything was my faith. It wasn't just running. Like that was what God guided me to do. But like putting my faith first and all those moments for the eagles and the fish and everything. That's all from God. That wasn't just coincidence. That's not luck. That's God. That's faith. Sam, how is your purpose then? How has that impacted even your media company? With everything, I became an ambassador for Duke. The whole time they were asking me how I was doing all this. And then they started putting things into people's hands to reach out to me.

[00:39:02] And then Duke wanted to do a documentary on me and they did. And it was an amazing aspect. We had a big premiere in High Point, High Point University. And just kind of helped with the documentary and all that kind of stuff. And that kind of led to my name and who I am and how I'm an entrepreneur as well. Kind of opened up the floor to that. And yeah, I started my company right before all this happened.

[00:39:28] And yeah, my name and everything that went with who I am and the company and being an entrepreneur kind of started to truly build off that because more and more people came across who I am and what I do. Sam, I love this, man. But what questions should I be asking that I'm not asking? I will say, which I am proud of, during chemo and radiation when I finished, I ran 125 miles or 124 miles the whole time. So when I finished, I didn't miss a single day.

[00:39:56] I committed and I got over 120 miles. And so it was a huge blessing for me and a big commitment. It showed me when you commit to anything and you put faith right there with it, you can fulfill anything. You can win. So we've got some ultras that are coming up for you at some point here, right? What's next for Sam, man? You got a 100 miler on there. You got a 50 miler. What's up? Whenever you tell me to join with you, I'm down. I mean, it's the second week of September. There's a special race that's up here, man. It's a backyard ultra. Are you familiar with those?

[00:40:26] The backyard? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. It's a special one, man. I'd love it if you came up for that one. Something like that is on the radar for me. I mean, it is. I want to see what I can do. I want to push. It is on the radar. So I would love to be able to stay in touch about something like that, whether it's that one or another one. I might need to train a little bit harder. It's something I want to do because I want to see what I'm capable of doing. And I know something like that is where you can really see what you're capable of doing. So watch. I'm going to introduce backyard ultra today. Today, you're going to come across one and it's going to be like, okay, Sam, we need Sam.

[00:40:55] Sam's doing that one. Yeah. It's a great environment. It's just because like Sam's faster than I am. So if we're doing a regular race, I'm going to see at the beginning, I may see at the end, right? 50 miles, 100 miles later, but chances are not. But in a backyard ultra, because everyone starts and ends each hour at the top of every hour, I can run a lap with you. Yeah. Which is awesome. I'm never able to do that. You know what I mean? Because speed does not matter. It just can't quit when it comes to those races. That's why the format is so cool.

[00:41:25] And I think something like that would be great for me for my first one. I really do. I've seen like the Nick Bear one that he does out of his farm, which I've watched that live, which is epic. That is something that I feel like I would probably be like a great entry for me into that because it is something that like I've thought about for a long time now. And to do it with you, I think would be epic. And it would be, there'd be something very unique and special about that too. Yeah. Indeed, man. When we were talking about like crying while we're running last year at that one, it was probably like 3 a.m.

[00:41:53] My foot had started hurting about mile 60. And so we're at mile 85, something like that. And I remember like the moonlight was coming across the cornfields and man, I'm just, I just started tearing up, man, just because it was painful. Yet at the same time, there was, I say God's an experience, you know, and there's something special when it hits you. You just know. Yeah. A hundred percent. And then it carries you through. Yeah. Yeah. It really does, man. Thank you, man, for taking this time, joining us.

[00:42:24] I'm glad you're a part of this, man. And really appreciate you, man. I really appreciate the opportunity. I'm very grateful that we got to do this and that, you know, we established friendships and we're going to do something fun together coming up. Thanks, bud. Yeah, man. Thank you. Thanks for listening to Mental Toughness with Dr. Rob Bell. To find out more about Dr. Rob, visit his website at drrobbell.com or follow him on Twitter

[00:42:50] at Dr. Rob Bell and subscribe to the show on your favorite podcast platform to get the next episode of Mental Toughness as soon as it's available. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time.