Ep. 144 - Zach Miskovic - From Pro Ice To Professional Advice

[00:00:09] Welcome to Mental Toughness with Dr. Rob Bell. Each week, Dr. Rob sits down with athletes, executives and expert coaches to talk about mental toughness and their hinge moment. Here's your host, Dr. Rob.

[00:00:39] I think the biggest thing is to be as supportive of your son or daughter as you can be with allowing them to play and have fun. Too often I see and I'm a part of conversations where you can sense that the parents are dictating

[00:01:06] the joy of the game. And sometimes that's hard for me to sit back and listen to where sometimes, and I don't say this often enough I think is less is often more with youth and kids should play multiple sports if possible. Now,

[00:01:38] Rob Bell So our guest today on our live podcast has been professional hockey player since 2009 when he was signed as a free agent by the Washington Caps, C-A-P-S Caps, Caps, Caps. He's played with 10 different teams who has professional career and currently he's a financial advisor with Thrivent.

[00:01:59] Still Coaches junior hockey today. And our guest today is Zach Miskovic. Now this conversation today will combine the journey of Zach as a hockey player, his transition to and from his current role in the financial service industry and all the ins and outs of that as well.

[00:02:19] But I'm excited for this. And then after I introduce him, which I have done, I want to tell the like quick story of it Zach man. Thanks so much for joining us, man. Rob Bell Absolutely Rob. Thanks for having me. It's exciting.

[00:02:31] Zach Miskovic So the reason why Zach is so special in my heart is because Zach played for four seasons, Indie Fuel. Scott Hillman was a coach at the time and it took my family to, you know, Indie Fuel Hockey Game.

[00:02:46] The reason why this is significant is because at the end of this game they had the, you know, skate around. And so where all the players stick around skate with the fans, they come out there, you know, do a couple laps and wave their hats and all that.

[00:03:01] And it's, whoa, man, a real hockey player. And Zach was one of the players that and again, this was after a loss as well. So I know how I am after I lose. Last thing I want to do is try and entertain anybody. But Zach was different.

[00:03:16] Zach was the individual who, I mean, you could just tell he was into the kids, wanted to make sure they had a good time and was really selfless. I felt when it came to that. So and you take an interest in that.

[00:03:29] I mean, you actually like doing that with the fans. Rob Bell I do. I think it's a very important part as a pro athlete though. With that being said, were there supporting us? I really took apart and made a point to share that experience back.

[00:03:50] And I also want to get back to the game and the sport. So if I can interest any individual or kid to like skating, let alone hockey a little bit more. I took a great interest in trying to make that happen. Right. Put a smile on their face.

[00:04:07] And that's just what I enjoy doing. Yeah. So Zach does the skate around and my daughter's seven, eight at the time. So she skates and they do the skate around. It was great. Wow. Thanks so much. Man, really appreciate that. And you could just tell Zach was special.

[00:04:25] So then we go out to eat. And as we go out to eat that night, we go to a local restaurant and bam, who is in the restaurant? Oh my gosh, it's Zach. Miskev. Here he is.

[00:04:35] So we walk up to him and, you know, it was really, it was just one of those opportunities to say thanks. That was it. Hey, thanks for taking the time, you know, skating around with Ryan.

[00:04:46] And what struck me was when right when we got up there and said, Hey, thanks Zach. Zach looked at my daughter and said, Hey, Ryan, like good to see you. Did you have fun at the game?

[00:04:57] And so I just felt like that was a special moment because it was like, okay, well, not only did it like take the time, but he remembered her name. Maybe you were Savant, like remember everybody's name.

[00:05:07] But it was like, wow, man, like even that just kind of showed, just remembering somebody's name, especially even an hour after the game. You know, it was like, I forget my neighbor's names. Sometimes I'm looking at him Zach, I forget them.

[00:05:21] But that just struck me as special and it just kind of showed like, Hey, this is what kind of person this, you know, this pro is. We appreciate that, Rob. Yeah, I know it's, I wouldn't call myself as Savant, but that's something I really

[00:05:36] took pride in trying to remember. But also we had, we have instilled to this day that I go back and see games at the fuel, their kids that their families are season ticket holders, partial or full.

[00:05:51] And I still get to see them as they've grown with my son Maddox, who's now eight, which is crazy to even say that because he grew up at the rink there. So, but I could see a lot of those kids who've grown up and see them.

[00:06:05] I can actually think of several names now, but names is something that I, again, I work at to make sure I can store them. I will say now that I talk to even more people than normal. It's more challenging, but it's just something I, again, I take

[00:06:20] an interest in pride in trying to remember. Yeah, I did a blog post like around that experience as well because I mean, this is 10 years ago. And the blog post that I did is it was something like, you know, never meet your heroes.

[00:06:34] And every time I've met my childhood hero, I was like, I was disappointed. You know, it was just a disappointment. You know what I mean? I bet like there's three different, three different times. And every time I was like, oh man, I was awful, you know.

[00:06:46] But I wrote in there, I said, but Zach Miskovic, he's the guy like you want as a model of like, hey, this is how you want to approach the game, approach life. And that, that was the part that just meant a lot, you know.

[00:06:57] And that's why you've read that blog post. Yep. Because I read that one. Yep. I'm going to post it on there. So, I mean, let's get into conversation, man. I just wanted to set that story out because it was like, man, you

[00:07:07] know, I can't wait for us to have this conversation delve into your career and then obviously the transition and where you're at now. But well, let's talk about that. Walk us through then, you know, your career from early on, like,

[00:07:25] when did you know this is something I'd love to do? Oh, wow. I'll take it way back, Rob. I showed interest a lot comes as a lot of us have siblings, right? The biggest thing for me was I was an older brother who's five years older than me.

[00:07:48] So there's a jump, there's a space there like it's not just a year. It's it's several and he took an interest in the hockey and I still have pictures day for my parents of me sitting on a

[00:08:00] lost and found big lost and found box watching my older brother play hockey. And I just loved it from that day. And dad and mom supported me skating and I just love the skate that started there.

[00:08:14] And then the growth of hockey was in addition to and it just became a love and a passion to be on the ice and in the winter. And when I knew is going to hit, I guess I never planned on being a pro hockey player.

[00:08:32] Sure, you play in the streets and you're imitating the NHLers and the great one and Bobby Orr and all these other great names. But I never truly thought it was going to happen or realize that was going to happen until I went to college and college

[00:08:49] ultimately was my goal. I want I wanted sports to pay for my schooling. It was at St. Lawrence, St. Lawrence University upstate New York, little little pin drop, Kate in New York and about 45 minutes south of auto Canada up there.

[00:09:05] So what before you got to college then like what was the sacrifice? What was the main sacrifice you had to make in order just to take that leap? Oh, wow. Yeah. A lot of sports are going this route, but I left home at 16.

[00:09:17] So I said, mom and dad, I got to go to a camp in Iowa, Cedar Rapids, Iowa. And I went there. My first time was at 15 years old. I was by far the youngest player on the ice.

[00:09:28] I was skating with men who had I had not gone through puberty at the time. So walking in the locker room and these guys had full beards and hair under their armpits and tattoos on their body. And some some had chewing tobacco in their mouth.

[00:09:45] And I'm like, whoa, like eyes were open and it was a little startling. But I was like, OK, I'm going to go sit and get dressed and. Do what I know best and had a great experience at that camp.

[00:09:57] But I was asked to, you know, go back home, train and come back and compete for a spot next year. OK, best best advice I ever got. And it was great, great. I really appreciated Coach Carlson who's still there today

[00:10:12] taking that time to have a conversation with me. That is the most important and impactful from any coach that you have is if you don't make a team to take time to talk to those individuals, give them feedback, prove feedback to work on and improve.

[00:10:29] So I did that, went back home, went back, told mom and dad that's what I want to do. I want to I want to leave home. And that's obviously hard for any parent to hear. But my parents, thankfully, were very supportive of my dream to do that.

[00:10:44] And yeah, I left home at 16 and really didn't look back, Rob. I didn't spend much time at home after that. So you go to college, you're playing there, St. Lawrence, I mean, obviously a great hockey program. What was that transition from there into the professional ranks then?

[00:11:01] Like that. That was eye opening because you go from it's a love of the game. And I don't want to say that the wrong way because I've been passionate about the game forever. But when something becomes a job and you start getting money for doing something,

[00:11:20] there's a different level of compete. And someone's chasing after your position day in and day out. So at training camp, though, because you get I mean, you're a free agent with the caps. What happened at training camp? Training camp was challenging. So training camp, I ended up.

[00:11:37] I think it wasn't the first year as a second year or maybe it was the first year. No, second year. I actually got injured. I played with some big, big time guys skating with some big, big name players. Guys that are still playing today and

[00:11:54] was very fortunate to be on the ice with those guys playing amongst them, learning from them. And I got I got cut from the NHL team from the caps and I got sent down to the minor league team in Hershey, Pennsylvania.

[00:12:07] Great place. Awesome. Got a love of the sweetest place on earth. But going from there, I ended up getting ultimately getting injured. My first major injury with a knee injury. And that that that set me back and that was challenging. And was that at training camp?

[00:12:24] Yeah, that was actually a second. That was after my first full season. But yeah, that was a big setback for me mentally. OK, so the second second going into my second year, the first year was awesome in Hershey.

[00:12:38] It was in the minor league in the HL, but we ended up winning a Calder Cup. Like I was on a championship team the year before they won it. They're actually that year they want it back to back. So I was not part of the the initial win,

[00:12:52] but the secondary cup by I ended up winning with them. And it was what a ride, right? I wasn't I didn't play every game in the playoffs. But when I got to play, it was a really unique experience.

[00:13:03] Obviously, that team was super talented up and down the line of depth was beyond depth of players, in my opinion. And just got to learn how to become, I'll say, a winner, right? And all the leaders in that room still have an impact on me today.

[00:13:20] And all lead at different levels in their current lives today, too. It's really it's exciting to see kind of where hockey is taking them to. So what was the next transition for you, man? You you went to championship there, Hershey, man. It's a great hockey town as well.

[00:13:37] I mean, they all get behind that team. So, you know, is it I just have to do this in order to make it back up to the show one step away? Like what was the message kind of going on at that time where you were?

[00:13:51] Yeah, a lot of it initially was, hey, at the time in the game, they for defense when I played defense, they wanted their defense one to have some seasoning or years under their belts as a professional. So they would normally send their guys to the HL.

[00:14:09] They said, hey, most of our defense in our lineup played two, three years in the HL to develop, get bigger, understand the game and then come back. So that was the message I received. Because I said, I understand kind of again, learning the pro life and that model.

[00:14:26] I said, completely understand that I will pay quote, unquote, pay my dues, go work and earn my spot back. And I felt that over that time period, the game changed. The game really developed in this very high speed young game.

[00:14:45] And that happens in all sports, I feel like, where now now you're seeing guys in the HL. I won't say young men, 18, 19 years old now, having opportunities, playing very high skilled, very good players. They're ending up in the HL right away.

[00:15:01] And the spectrum of age is very broad now, 18 all the way. I mean, you got your local Chris Chaleos is some of the other guys that have played well into their forties. Hard to come by, but guys are still there, right?

[00:15:14] But I think that age gap is going to narrow, but that was a challenge for me because I was competing, was told initially that I needed to wait and work on my game. And then I next year, I know I saw them signing 18, 19 year olds

[00:15:28] and they're getting the opportunity to play in the HL right away. So that was really challenging for me, but also three years in another hurdle happened where we had actually the HL had a lockout season causing a big ripple in the HL to come down to the HL

[00:15:47] and fill ice time there. Guys were just looking to play, make sure that they stayed and stayed ready for whenever that lockout was lifted. And the players agreed with the ownership on moving forward. And at that time I had to make a decision where the stay in Hershey

[00:16:06] and take my chances to make my jump to the NHL with the Capitals or look at other options. And sometimes when you're in a tough spot, the grass looks greener on the other side, that expression. And I had an opportunity to go play in Chicago, in my hometown

[00:16:29] for the Chicago Wolves and I took it. It was kind of one of those you grew up watching these guys and then that organization and you get an opportunity to play at hometown and I jumped right at it and went there.

[00:16:41] And I don't regret it one bit, but it was also walking in again, lockout to pretty much two teams, two NHL teams in that room. And you're fighting for playing time every single night. So it was challenging, but at the end of the day,

[00:17:01] you know, I was getting to wake up every day, train, be among some of the best players in the world and battle and compete on a daily basis. So it was challenging at the same time, a lot of fun,

[00:17:16] especially being close to home and around a bunch of friends and family that was able to come see me play. And I was only there actually thinking about it because yeah, I played on 10 teams in 10 years. So that time during the lockout was a pretty pivotal time

[00:17:32] in my career where so you know, there's always I started to feel like I kept the car packed, half packed, ready to travel. And I think that's something that's not seen or heard about or talked about quite enough in the minor leagues of sport.

[00:17:48] But I was not settled by any means for a couple of years there. I was on probably, I think in that span for your four or five and six, I was amongst, you know, probably five clubs,

[00:18:01] five or six clubs in that time period, which I put some miles on my Ford Explorer at the time. So hey, good looking. If you like this podcast and are already a badass, but it's all way too complicated, then visit our website,

[00:18:27] DrRobBell.com and schedule a call with us to help capture your very own hinge moment. You know, there's always a moment where we title the podcast. So I think like 10 teams in 10 years might be up, man. Oh, I love it. Yeah, yeah, that's good. Why not?

[00:18:55] Yeah. So with that, and I kind of want to tie in, you know, the mentoring piece and then with youth hockey and the coaching dude now back to that. Right? Sure. But where did your like next transition kind of go into them? You're playing minor league hockey,

[00:19:15] doing the best you can, working hard. What happens like to the vision then? And I mean, because you're playing the sport you still love. It's at a pro level, but you still have like that next level you'd want to get to.

[00:19:28] Where were you kind of that period in your life? I think the biggest part for me was learning and Hershey, taking things I learned from Hershey from the leadership there and getting really excited to instill how to be a pro amongst the team.

[00:19:48] I was fortunate to be a leader amongst the groups that I played for. And that I took pride in helping the younger guys understand what it took, be away from home for some of them, helping them get settled in their apartments.

[00:20:05] You know, stuff is stuff like even setting up bank accounts and you know, help them change tires and I'll just life lessons, you know, and just supporting them and being a bigger brother, you know, and I appreciated doing that stuff and I enjoyed it.

[00:20:22] Coaching and giving back and leading a group was a lot of fun and I liked that. I don't want to call it pressure, but I like being that go-to guy in the locker room if somebody needed anything. And so the next step for me was meeting my wife.

[00:20:40] You know, when I played in Rockford and we had where our son Maddox and that was the next pitfall point in my career because at that point, I was year six and I needed a contract.

[00:20:55] I had some big things going up in life and I had no idea where I was gonna play next because at the time I only think pretty much I played contract to contract and I needed a contract and Scott Hillman actually, I know you spoke with him earlier.

[00:21:13] He reached out to me and said, hey, Zach loved for you to come and check out in me. And I said, you know what, Scott? I'm having a kid. We're from Chicago and he's not far away. Let's do it.

[00:21:24] So now I know I was going down in a level to play, but he wanted me to come in and support his team and mentor his players to get them to the next level. And that really resonated with me. The ownership was very supportive of that same model

[00:21:41] and they're very appreciative of what I brought to the table. And that's where obviously even your own story resonates with exactly what I want to help the club do is give back to the community and doing the best way I knew how.

[00:21:58] So I took great pride in doing everything I could to represent the indie fuel and our club the best. So... And so when you're doing that, you've seen Bull Derm, correct? Yeah. So I mean, was it like that? I mean, hey, the veterans coming in here,

[00:22:14] we need you to mentor and need you to be a leader here and keep getting paid to show up to the ice. Yeah, kind of. But I still had a fire for the game, you know? And I still really wanted to get back up into the HL

[00:22:34] and then still had aspirations. My aspirations that hit the NHL diminished when I took that step back, but I still knew I could compete at a high level. And I had opportunities within the first couple of years playing for the fuel to do that. But...

[00:22:54] So what happens with that? Somebody up top is gonna come back, come down. Hey, let's just watch Zach play, see if he's got speed. Yeah, it's actually injuries. It's all injury-based. So if a team goes down and they lose three or four guys

[00:23:07] to injury or vice versa, the trickle effect, you know, they'll say, hey, we need a veteran guy. We just need somebody to fill a role for two, three weeks while this guy gets healed up and then you get sent back down. Did you get that cup of coffee?

[00:23:23] Yeah, I did in Charlotte. They brought me up and there's a lot of other little nuances to it, but I was a veteran. I would have hit veteran staz, which is at the HL if I played a couple more games up there.

[00:23:37] So they kept me up to be inside the room and be a part of the room, but I was not able to play another game or else they would have had to take, I would have fulfilled a different category within the makeup of the team.

[00:23:50] So that's, again, that's my understanding. I don't know how true, but they kept me there. So throughout the playoff run. So that was pretty awesome. But yeah, I mean, once that happened- Were you on the bench or just never hit the ice? Never hit the ice.

[00:24:06] I was in the stands. In the stands, yeah. There's quite a few for every team. There's always guys that are gonna be in the stands watching and at that point, after I played the games needed and they got their body back.

[00:24:21] I was in the stands because they didn't know also if that guy would get recalled up and vice versa. So they didn't play the back and forth game. Okay. So, but yeah, that happened that happened from time to time. So did that quite a bit throughout that latter,

[00:24:38] middle section of my career there, up and down and sideways. Want to listen to your favorite music but you're sick of all the commercial interruptions and negative news today, tune into cuckoradio.com. Music for your mindset. We're a commercial free online radio station. Play nothing but hits.

[00:24:58] Our free iOS and Android apps are available for download at cuckoradio.com. Oh, and so back to like your time here at Indie then, what stands out to you in terms of like best games or memories like on the ice? Oh gosh, there's several actually.

[00:25:28] So I played with a lot of guys. I shook a lot of hands as a captain in the team and the way the locker room rolls. We were talking about how that goes at the ECHL level, the door sometimes feels like a revolving door.

[00:25:44] But some of the memories I have on the ice and even practice, a lot of the memories stem not even so much from games but the locker room. I think a lot of guys talk about that but it's just a camaraderie within the room.

[00:25:56] Some of the phone calls I'd get one guy, but again leading into the changing tire, his pouring rain, he's on the side of the road, didn't know who to call, guess who got the call? I did in a suit and helped him change his tire

[00:26:11] in the mud, right? So happy to do it, right? Happy to help my teammate out, learn how to do it, get it done. One of those, obviously we made the playoffs for the club the first time that was exciting. The ending of it was not as exciting.

[00:26:29] We were pretty banged up going into the playoffs and to lead a wall, I swept us that year. So that was not the most exciting memory but it was fun for the club to get there and be a part of that for the first time.

[00:26:42] As well as just getting to make some of those relationships inside the room and help guys grow and guys have moved on. And suddenly guys I got to sit beside in the room or playing in the NHL today. And seeing that and getting to cheer those guys on,

[00:27:00] that's the most important thing to me. And those guys I think appreciate the path that they took. And I'll tell you that, they'll never forget the end of fuel and where they started and where they are now and they'll have appreciation for it.

[00:27:16] When people talk about life lessons, so I mean this is one of the life lessons I mean obviously you're there for a teammate. But when we talk about communication, handle adversity, building confidence, your ability to focus, your ability to refocus, let go of mistakes.

[00:27:34] You talk about that like what were some of those life lessons that you felt were really important that was on the ice that would serve you later? For sure, I mean I think as an athlete you always go through times where you're super competitive and you're not winning.

[00:28:00] You feel like you give it all, you do everything you can, but in a team game it takes more than one. So it's how can I... What happens in the locker room when that's going on? Well when you're in, I'll call it a drought or a losing streak.

[00:28:17] It depends on who's in the room. Some people get frustrated, some people outburst and get angry and I wouldn't say point fingers but just are trying to pull out two strings to figure out what's going on. Sometimes coaches come in and I'll say go ballistic

[00:28:38] or think that that's the need. Or we'll watch a lot of video but for me is also trying to bring the room down and calm down, take a deep breath. Like settle in, figure out what were we doing best? How can we work better together?

[00:29:00] Because in my opinion anger, frustration sometimes that's wasted energy and if you can learn how to really direct some of that energy into a more positive lane more better outcomes will happen quicker. And so that's something that I really challenged guys to do

[00:29:20] also to dig down deep and just really think about what they are here and the opportunity that has been presented them and take full advantage of it, right? Enjoy it. Like don't be nervous because all too often when we're losing

[00:29:41] they're thinking about, okay am I gonna keep my job? Right so guys start gripping the stick a little bit tighter not playing loose and to their best abilities because they feel this weight on their shoulders. So for me a lot of it was just sharing

[00:29:57] hey you are here for a reason, you have the abilities, you gotta go and for me in the role I was in there's a lot just building confidence and sharing words of calm, supportive nature and really in a sense keeping the team uplifted

[00:30:18] and then depending on the goalies and situation those guys are unique guys in amongst themselves but there's no reason I think that I didn't love sitting beside those guys because I wanted to make sure that they're in the best mental place that they could be as well

[00:30:35] and know that they're supported. So I always had a special place in my heart for the goalies I got to play with and they usually ended up being pretty good buddies of mine. Yeah nice man. I can just kind of see you in the locker room there

[00:30:48] man being that calm and voice. So with that did you ever have to have the really tough conversations with talented guys that didn't put forth the effort or you knew that they weren't all in in one way or another? Yeah so those are not fun conversations.

[00:31:08] Sometimes it is stuff outside even the aspect of the rink in the locker room right? Just being a good human, doing the right things, how to be quote unquote a pro or a better person. I did have to have those conversations

[00:31:28] and I when I had to do those I thought it was important that it wasn't always just me. I had other captains that I wanted to make sure that they're a part of that conversation whether they wanted to or not because I think it's important to when appropriate

[00:31:47] have other guys there to support and also share that thought if that makes sense. It was not always required but I think I had to really pick and choose when that was needed because sometimes I didn't want the player to feel like I was attacking him directly.

[00:32:09] It's a group thought and sometimes you have to make a decision on how you present certain conversations especially if they're harder conversations where a player might or a teammate or whoever might feel like you're attacking them.

[00:32:28] But all you're looking is trying to get the best out of them and work with them and do everything that they can do. So I think that for me was not the fun stuff in terms of the leadership but you need to do it from time to time.

[00:32:43] So we talk about obviously hinge moments. Yeah. And COVID when COVID hit was obviously a major hinge moment for everybody but for you in particular because it led to a major transition then in your life. Walk us through that hinge moment and take your time with it

[00:33:04] but however, any kind of direction you wanna go in but what occurred then in your life? Wow. Many things, many things. So COVID for all of us was I think super challenging. Right? As we spoke about I think I didn't realize how much

[00:33:21] of a people person I was until that time in life. It emphasized how much I needed others to talk with and be around. Now that with COVID, they had a lot of sports almost let's just be honest, the world shut down

[00:33:41] and that was gonna be year 11 for me playing but I was battling with the opportunity to potentially play or end my career to double hip surgery. So wear and tear, all the fun stuff. The team supported an agreement.

[00:34:04] We ended up moving forward with surgery on both my hips and that was challenging along with COVID. I was making transition out didn't know what that was gonna look like and it really came down to the 12th hour to make that decision to have the surgery versus play.

[00:34:25] And for me, I think the stars aligned. I'm very thankful that we collectively made that decision because the team took care of me during COVID where a lot of guys were out jobs and we're not getting paid. So I had my first surgery pretty much the next week

[00:34:45] and then- What time period was that Zach? Oh shoot, probably August. Okay. August and then I think September. So about eight weeks later, I had my next one and then two days after that, the hospital shut down like everything closed, the world shut down

[00:35:07] for a good period there and ended up leaving both my hip surgeries without PT. They told, hey, everybody's just gonna stay at home do the best you can, rest them, heal up. By the way, I have a, at the time I had what,

[00:35:24] four year old, Maddox was ripping around, we're in transition, we're deciding whether we're gonna stay in Indy, reside here, put roots down, keep our Maddox in school here, expand our family, went through, Lindsay and I went through a loss of a child at that time too.

[00:35:47] Just a lot of things happened in life. So it turned to be really dark for me. Challenging is better part of two years for recovery. So the recovery of the hips because of COVID, but they honored my PT that was needed.

[00:36:04] So that's what added that length of time. The team took care of me through that whole time and but with that being said is only a fraction of what I was making, but it was something and Lindsay had to go back to work

[00:36:21] and I had to figure out what the heck I was gonna do next. For me, that was, I was like, oh, I'm ready to do that. Everybody thinks they're ready, right? But I wasn't ready. I don't think mentally I was ready to leave the game quite yet,

[00:36:35] even though I had an amazing career playing but I also enjoyed, you know, OMS doing DIY projects, had a couple different things in the works there and I had a cousin of ours that was like, hey, why don't you just get real estate license?

[00:36:59] I said, what does it take? They're like, just study and take a test. I said, I can do that. Yeah. So I'll just worked at that, did that. My neighbor was like, hey, join our team. Said, love the concept of team.

[00:37:14] I'm in, like I didn't even think twice to interview with anybody else. Didn't think about it, really just was leaning on others for that support of what to do next and very grateful for that and went in guns of liaison and said, hey, I'm gonna do,

[00:37:29] I set a goal, very lofty goal to the point where I think everybody in the room looked at me who was veterans in the real estate space and they kind of all chuckled, you know? But you took that athlete mentality into then the next level.

[00:37:43] Yeah, my next step, yeah. And I had two years to sit there and stew on it. So I was pretty antsy at the time and pretty driven because I, we were, I don't wanna say we're struggling, but mentally in my head

[00:38:00] I wasn't bringing in money to support the family at the level that I was before and wanted to. So I wanted to go out there and prove that I could do something else. And so I did. Quick question, man. And I love that because with that athlete mentality,

[00:38:18] one of the things is kind of when the cheering stops. I mean, the best part about being a pro athlete is playing the game. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, obviously you had the locker rooms or relationships, but you do all that preparation to play.

[00:38:30] When that stops, there seemed to, I mean, was there a gap then that you just kind of felt then in your life? I mean, did you go through depression? Like what was that? You know, I mean, you're dealing with not even being able to physically cope. Right.

[00:38:44] Yeah, no. There run left. I mean, what was it like? Well, I lost kind of my whole, I'll call it my like sanctuary, right? That's why I refer to the ring still today, right? So that space was gone, training was gone.

[00:39:03] That mindset of wake up, go work out, be amongst guy, be amongst my training group, be amongst these different groups of people was not there, right? Now I was really reliant. Not very thankful for my wife and my son at the time, right?

[00:39:20] To really support me as well as my family. But you know, but I was seeing them 24 seven and I've never seen them that long, right? And I think a lot of us were challenged by that and then I was coping with a lot of other things

[00:39:34] and it got challenging. I put on a ton of weight. I wasn't moving, obviously double hip surgery. They wanted me to walk, but not, I wasn't able to move that much as on crutches. I knew how to eat. I'll tell you that.

[00:39:50] I was burning probably 1000 plus 2000, 3000 calories a day. So I knew how to do that. I think that's a struggle for a lot of athletes as they stopped playing. But for coping and doing all that stuff. Yeah, I was in the dark spot to be honest, Rob is challenging.

[00:40:05] There's many days I didn't want to do much. I'd call it depressed for sure. Was it, did I verbalize it at the time looking back on it? My wife would challenge me or ask, hey, like let's go for a walk or let's go downstairs

[00:40:22] and we'll work out together. And she had pushed me to do stuff. But there's times that yeah, I wasn't the nicest person. You know, I didn't have a drive or a purpose to go do those things in the same light or manner anymore

[00:40:43] because I wasn't gonna go play the game. Right? Now with that being said, it took me the better part of two years. Honestly, probably even through that first year of doing real estate to really understand how I needed to get back to taking care of myself

[00:40:59] and the mindset of taking care of yourself is the best gift you can give anybody. Your wife, your spouse, your kids, everything. You gotta take care of you. I'm very much a yes man but learning how to say no sometimes to make space and time.

[00:41:17] I mean, we've had conversations times the most precious gift you have, right? So to make time for you prioritize and re-understand and prioritize what was the most important to me. That I'm still juggling, to be honest. But I know what's most important to me.

[00:41:39] It's just how can I manage and juggle each thing all while filling my cup in my, well, I'll call it my bucket, right? With things that give me joy in the sense of coaching, being a part of the hockey game still in the sense of coaching,

[00:41:58] making impact on as many of the youth hockey players here locally as I can and having that opportunity has been a gift from several. And then just understanding what that next step is and how I can continue that coaching in different avenues, different lights

[00:42:16] with people, being around people. And I had to really step back and see how I could do that. I saw it glimmer when I was in real estate. I got satisfaction of helping people achieve goals, the goal of buying a home and helping them understand,

[00:42:32] hey, this house is perfect for you. This isn't the one, right? Having them understand that process and helping them through it, I got satisfaction from. And my clients, I think really appreciate that. And as after running and running, we were blessed to have our daughter, Maelyn,

[00:42:49] and that came a reprioritization of time because I was working a lot of nights and weekends and Lindsay was like, hey, we got to figure something else out. And so that's what happened. You went all in, all in the United States. I worked every week in a minute.

[00:43:05] I'll never forget and Lindsay won't let this down. I was up at midnight writing the offers. Everybody knows the COVID time. COVID, there's multiple offers on every home. It was challenging, but I was very successful at the time because I was the guy there competing.

[00:43:20] I competed and I figured it out. And I made it my goal to get my clients exactly what they wanted and how to do it and making sure it was the best interest of them. You got to finish that story though. What didn't she let down?

[00:43:40] Yeah, so I'm not proud of this. I'm gonna share it. No, I'm okay. So it was crazy, but we were in the hospital with Maelyn. Or sorry, she was about to give birth to Maelyn, hottest real estate market going.

[00:43:58] And I had a couple of clients that we've been looking for a while and they reached out and I said, hey guys, like Lindsay is, they knew that she was pregnant. We were pregnant. We're in the hospital. It's go time. Well, we really liked this house.

[00:44:13] And I said, okay. Well, she's almost, it's almost time. I have my computer. Like let me see what I can do. I can call a friend to help show you a house and I'll write the offer if we need to. Meanwhile, Lindsay is like, what are you doing?

[00:44:29] WTF? Like we're about to have a daughter. You're worried about making a real estate transaction. And the less than proud of myself moment was Lindsay gave birth to Maelyn. Maelyn with everything checked out okay. I said, hey, because everything's okay, I'm gonna run and show a house quick,

[00:44:55] write an offer and I'll be back. And sure enough, I would zipped out the door, wrote an offer that made nothing. We did not get it, get the home and came back. And yeah, Lindsay was not. That was I think the tipping point

[00:45:10] where I, Lindsay had made a comment. We had a conversation. That was that couple was the last couple I worked with in real estate. But it was impactful. I mean, it was just mind changing. And I didn't see it. I was just again running hard blinders on

[00:45:32] trying to do the best I could. But very, very blinded by that. Goal mentality of I'm gonna achieve everything that I put my mind to. Pretty much at anybody's cost, the cost of my family and the communication and being present. So I had to realign that mentality.

[00:45:57] So the past leads us to the present with everything that happens. What was the transition then into your current role just professionally? Yeah, no, I think a good buddy of mine playing I'm a math guy. He's a finance and math business guy and we live together.

[00:46:20] And we always, we were there just always picking numbers with each other and creating business plans. And you have some downtime and you're on the bus. And so we were talking about all that. He ended up doing leaving the game a little bit sooner than I did.

[00:46:36] Started a business in the finance space and really wanted me to be a part of it out East. And I said, I'm not ready to stop playing. I wanna help you out. But I think at some point I'd love to join you.

[00:46:52] But at that time, you talk about hinged moments and everything with the second child moving out East and further away from family was not an option. And so I just leaned in and took some of my exams and got my feet wet here locally.

[00:47:10] And found, great joy in helping families achieve their goals in a greater fashion than just homes. And so that has been super rewarding for me, balancing that with all the other things I like to do. But I also found it's really rewarding

[00:47:30] because the company that I currently work for we really do a nice job giving back to the community. And that gave me a sense of gratification like I had in hockey, like I got to do with Ryan and be present amongst the youth locally as well as others.

[00:47:52] So they've done a really nice job helping me balance my life in that sense of I'll call it a work life but give back balance. And therefore I think today I've really found my spot in what I like to do and being able to encompass

[00:48:11] everything that I was gratified with and wanted to impose when I played in my post hockey career. And still growing that, still learning a lot. I think I'm a lifetime lifelong learner. I love learning new things. I am kind of a different bird rob.

[00:48:34] I think I shared that with you before, but a math guy, I have a math degree, I have a fine arts degree. I played sports, I like music, musicals, all those things. Renaissance man. Yeah, I call myself a circle. You know, so, but I think that's something

[00:48:51] that if I can learn something new or give back something be handy and just learn how to do something new constantly, I really enjoy that. And I love helping my son learn how to do things as well and as well as my daughter. So it's just fun.

[00:49:08] I just enjoy it. So with even the coaching that you do now. So I have a sense that, I mean, you'd be the coach that everyone wished they had. What is it that, I'm gonna tie this one kind of into the parents piece, right?

[00:49:27] What is it that the parents need to know about youth hockey, especially in kind of the Midwest? Obviously I think the different pockets might be a little bit different. But what is it that some of those parents need to know that hey, they just have no clue about?

[00:49:52] And I preface this by saying, if parents really knew what it took to be a pro athlete, like they'd never sign up. They look at Alex Kovechkin or Sidney Crosby, they're not looking at a career like Zach Miskovic. No offense. Hey, none taken.

[00:50:11] But you get my point, right? Yeah, well that's what social media does. Yeah, nobody's looking at the 150th best golfer in the world saying I want my son to be like that. Correct. But if you look at the 150th best golfer in the world

[00:50:26] or 150th best hockey player or doctor, then pretty damn good. Yeah, no, I love the way you phrase that Rob. And yeah, no offense taken at all. I think the biggest thing is to be as supportive of your son or daughter as you can be

[00:50:50] with allowing them to play and have fun. Too often I see and I'm a part of conversations where you can sense that the parents are dictating the joy of the game. And sometimes that's hard for me to sit back and listen to where sometimes,

[00:51:16] and I don't say this often enough, I think is less is often more with youth and kids should play multiple sports if possible. Now that's harder today than ever before because the overlapping and I think, I'm gonna use the word greed amongst youth sports.

[00:51:39] The demands are higher than ever for youth athletes in sports specific aspects and really picking which sport they're gonna play even younger than before. In the sense of for myself, I'm grateful my parents signed me up for everything, try it all. Who knows what you like, right?

[00:52:05] Well, hockey is pretty consistent in my life, I'll say that. But everything else was in addition to because I wanted to play amongst my friends, hockey took me away from my school group quite frequent but I tried basketball, sorry Hoosiers, I'm not very good at it.

[00:52:23] I tried soccer, I enjoyed soccer cause I can run, I've probably, I've never been formally diagnosed with ADHD but I think my parents knew something I didn't. So that ran the gas right out of me cause I'd run all over the place

[00:52:38] but and then didn't try just about everything, volleyball, and then by the time I got to eighth grade, mom and dad said, hey now we're getting to a point where you're getting very competitive within some of these games

[00:52:52] and you gotta figure out before you get to high school what is your one or two sports? Bear question at that time in my opinion. Had to give up baseball, tried volleyball and hockey ended up with lacrosse and hockey and then it went down to hockey.

[00:53:10] So I was very again thankful that my parents gave me those opportunities to play all those sports and that I think made me help me understand better what I wanted to do moving forward and learning those games helped me overall I think really helped my hockey game.

[00:53:33] Why? Cause in every sport you're using different muscle groups, you have different visualization, you have to learn how to play the game a different game strategically which is gonna then help you strategically in the game that you ultimately play. So different sports teach different lessons. Even creativity.

[00:53:53] Correct, correct. So telling parents that it's okay to play multiple sports now being a parent now and running kids all over the place and again another love and appreciation for my father and my mom figuring out yeah I had three other siblings Rob.

[00:54:10] So home was in the vehicle in the car most afternoons after school for us for pretty much our whole lives. So I know it's challenging but if your goal in your head is to support your kid and you want them to get to the highest level possible

[00:54:29] there's sacrifice on both fronts and everybody's levels but don't want it more than your son or daughter. If you do that, that changes the element of satisfaction, gratification and overall I think it causes a bad taste in your son or daughter's mouth

[00:54:53] that they don't want to continue it. They're just trying to please you and they don't truly enjoy it. And that's something is challenging to hear but ultimately for the betterment of your son and daughter's mental health and wellbeing I think being your their biggest cheerleader

[00:55:18] in a positive way and being loud and rowdy on the sidelines or the stands and being very supportive of how they present themselves each game whether win or loss and they get the same mental reward and love from them, their parents that's the biggest thing I can share.

[00:55:39] Yeah, love it man. Zach, what question should I be asking that I'm not asking? Oh wow, I don't know. I guess the biggest thing I guess the thing that I'd love to share is just how to create better habits right for your kids

[00:56:19] and it's okay to be, I'll say rigid, right? If your kids want to do more and get better and they're pushing you to be better maybe it's okay listening, right? A parent, I think a parent said it best actually a couple of parents

[00:56:38] I'm working with a sled hockey player right now and his dad's amazing, amazing. His son gets up and he tells his son I will take you anytime you want to go to the hockey ring but I'll only do it if you come and get me to take you

[00:57:01] and so I work with him at six in the morning. I show up and I'm an early guy and I get to places like when I had to go to my sanctuary in the morning of the hockey ring I get there early to mentally prepare

[00:57:14] and coach my kids at that hour because I got to have the energy and bring it because obviously that's early for a lot of those guys. Well, I'll tell you what, his name is Zach too and he gets there way before me

[00:57:28] and he's there as the door opens and he's on the ice before I even walked through the door because he has a love and passion and his dad's like he woke me up at 4.30 this morning he wanted to be there right away

[00:57:39] because he has that drive to be the best. So don't get me wrong, it's not the hour that we all love waking up for most I will say but if that's your kid's passion, desire maybe do it for them, right? The other thing I think about now

[00:58:01] more than ever obviously is Maddox's challenge some coaches, right? To let them enjoy and have fun because there's a lot of very competitive individuals that still have that competitiveness on the sidelines or as a coach and at the end of the day they need to step back

[00:58:29] and check that for the betterment of that group of kids because them screaming and yelling and arguing amongst other coaches and or parents is not what these kids need, any kids. And I'll follow that up with shoot I had another thought there Rob

[00:58:53] but yeah, no I think to that note I just think if your son or daughter truly loves the game that they play find the right coach don't worry about the level of play because I think the biggest impact moment in my life

[00:59:21] that gave me the most drive was when I was cut from a team played, I was supposed to go up with my team from single A to double A which is a higher level I got cut from that team ultimately was very upset

[00:59:39] that was my youth probably like what 10 years old ish can't remember exact year but I was devastated and my parents have said hey your brother's gonna play here your other brother's gonna play here but it looks like you're gonna have to play

[00:59:57] at another organization if you wanna play at that level we can cry out this week and coming up if you want. Okay, I'll do it made the highest team above that double A team at that other organization but wasn't right for me, I wanted to play

[01:00:12] with my brothers so I had to call my parents are like okay let's figure out how do we play at that organization well I played pretty much like in house select slash house league C hockey so we're talking like steps below where I was hoping to play

[01:00:29] or could have played thank goodness that that coach or that dad who was a coach had amazing coaching ability mentorship accepted me on his team I had to call him my parents made me take the rotary phone okay I'm dating myself but rotary phone and call him

[01:00:48] and asked if I could play on his team for the season talk about impact at like 10 or 11 years old and my parents instilled that like you're gonna have the conversation not me, you are right this is what you wanna do you're gonna do it

[01:01:03] I think that's important too but that following year I mean that year gave me a lot of learning lessons I was able to help other kids learn help coach that's where a lot I think my leadership aspects were developing

[01:01:16] and that following year I played at the highest level I could at that age at AAA which is higher than the AA and higher than some of those kids that I didn't get to play with and got to just keep pushing the envelope from then on

[01:01:32] but that gave me that internal drive to do that and it's okay, it's okay not to make that team that you wanna make more in this world that it's instant gratification if you do this, you get that you just walk into things and you get it

[01:01:54] our kids need to learn those harder lessons because later in life if they've never quote unquote lost that's even harder later in life to learn so support them, love on them but a lot of them fail you got some mic drop moments there, Zach appreciate it Rob.

[01:02:16] I love it man thanks so much man for coming on and just sharing your testimony man your story I love it all man, I really appreciate it thank you Rob, I appreciate you having me and I'm so pumped we live close by each other now

[01:02:28] yeah, that's good, thanks so much thanks for listening to mental toughness with Dr. Rob Bell to find out more about Dr. Rob visit his website at drroppbell.com or follow him on Twitter at Dr. Rob Bell and subscribe to the show on your favorite podcast platform

[01:02:47] to get the next episode of mental toughness as soon as it's available thanks for listening and we'll see you next time